AAO25.com
Community => The Lounge => Media & Art => Topic started by: Jared on Sunday, January 24, 2010, 22:13:25 PM
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(https://aao25.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg199.imageshack.us%2Fimg199%2F7387%2Feattherich.jpg&hash=8fd9747e15e51463285a31612d1b2063)
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Interesting, simple and powerful.
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Interesting, simple and powerful.
thx, i did realize it was that big on the forums lol
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Detail: Correct the hex code on the arrows so it actually makes the BG hex code.
Other than that, perty well done.
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Dann, when did you become a perfectionist?
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When didn't I ?
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mAAp. I fixed/rejected several of your works because of that. Now you're spotting things I overlook. This is a good sign :)
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Just for the cuddles, this is the critique I provided on Jared's work in Redg Forums.
At this point, I feel as if this piece is lacking of two substantial things: Texture and Text-Geometry
This piece reminds me of the old post-war work done on poster-illustration. These were usually rather grungy-like and contained several subliminal messages as well. In that sense, this piece matches equally. It does feel, however, as if this piece is roaming on two distinct directions. It's a fight between simple and complex, clean and messy, straightforward and subliminal, and so on. There is clearly a shock of interventions on this pieces; each generating a lot of confusion towards the full understanding of the piece. I have a WIP of a piece within the same style that had texture-work applied to it already. I'll post it just so you can understand more clearly what and how texture can re-enforce the sense of impact, revolt and fixness to your piece.
(https://aao25.com/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi625.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Ftt337%2FDannBOX%2FIco-Iconv2.jpg&hash=a925b840530bbd35b1cf288344fe9f51)
Like so. As you can see, I've never got myself to add actual war elements to the piece. Yet to do that. Bottom line is; texture work.
As per the text-geometry; I'd suggest you look more into typography. A good way to make it all seem fit in properly is to tweak around with the density of each words, and place it in a way that it will create invisible geometrical structures within. The first awkward thing I have noticed about the text (position/size-wise) was the The before "Rich" and after "Eat". It just, somehow, seems completely misplaced or unfit of its appearance. If I were you, I would have rather make it smaller or slimmer. As equally important, and still on the geometrical aspect of the piece ---Those two horizontal stripes getting off the piece would have actually --in my understanding and opinion-- worked better a tad up higher, as it would complement the sense of a square frame suggested by the allocation of the text.
There's a video that is just about right-on this kind geometrical asserting. Also happens to be an interesting music.
http://www.youtube.com/v/vow7sD1LcbY
Keep it up.
Looking forward to see further work being done to this.
Klaasillu